There's no place like home...and it's kitchen.

Ahhhhhh, home. i am so blissfully happy i cannot tell you. i told my mom as we drove in to town, "at this moment i feel so incredibly safe, just like that." it is so bazaar to be surrounded once again by things that are so familiar. to suddenly fall back into my old routine without even thinking. to hear Naomi's voice chattering in the other room. these are truly the things that make home, "home" for each and every one of us.
let's see, since I've been home i have tried to do all the things that remind me of home. sitting outside in the lawn chairs with mama and Naomi, having "girl talk." getting doughnuts in the morning from the little bakery across the street. but most of all here people, i have the neeeeeed to cook. the huge spacious kitchen calls my name, with it's blue chrome counter tops, and hardwood floors. everything is just as i left it, the jars of flour, and big cutting boards. i am really and TRULY home now....



My first goal was to make these mini raspberry cheesecakes, a recipe i made up on a rainy day in the dining room. they were everything they were supposed to be. to top it all off i made the raspberry sauce with both red and golden raspberries. got get some, their in season! they are sooo pretty, and have a bit more of a sugary taste than red ones. we ate these on our precious sunny day outside before the spring rain attacked us.





Next i drove out to my dad's house to work my magic. the cool thing about going to culinary school is that you have instant bragging rights, who else is going to challenged you alleged know-how?? dinner was served on the big kitchen table with the help of my dear sisters Hannah and Naomi. Naomi insisted on being included in the prayer before we ate because, i quote " she stirred the sauce, and zested an orange ok!" we ate pecan crusted tilapia, served over garlic and parsley cous cous, and leek and onion caramelized in white wine. then I it topped with an orange balsamic gastruiqe and fresh feta cheese. a nice salad and homemade bread and brie cheese from shadow bakery in covington topped it off. so good! it is considered a true accomplishment when you have picky teenage boys going back for more! Hannah made her infamous chocolate chip cookies for dessert. don't scoff at the simplicity, Hannah's cookies are a force to be reckoned with, and have become famous in these parts. you have not tasted a chocolate chip cookie until you've tasted Hannah's. it's a fact.


that night was the first time we all of us kids had been together in a long time, and it was truly wonderful. I am so thankful for my family... dare i say it, even more than food!! This week the phrase "absence makes the heart grow fonder" has proved itself true.

Pro's and Con's

Yesterday i sat at this outdoor cafe, enjoying the sun beating down on me, wear flip flops and a t-shirt. eating a salad with strawberries on it and feeling as though there was finally hope in a chicagoland filled with winter and snow......

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this is me today.... walking in a blizzard... freezing my ass off and cursing myself for jinxing it with such frivolous thoughts yesterday. I woke up this morning to a day filled with weather from satan himself. so get this, not only was it snowing so hard that your face had snow stuck to it, but it was raining too... hard! I'm walking to the store to get some movies for this terrible day, and i keep getting hit with ICE CHUNKS! so now we have snow, rain, and chunks of spitting ice. i'm wading through it, i'm covered in it... for pete's sake it's march. i want this to be done now. i started getting very depressed until i got a call from one of my dear friends who had been throwing up for two days straight. to make it worse it was gorgeous where she was, which in my opinion is much worse. it's one thing to be stuck inside on a crappy day, it's another to be stuck inside on one that's perfect. and i'm not throwing up.. always a plus. so i sat down and wrote list of pro's and cons. there were two ways i could be looking at this day.

#1. "this is the worst day of my life. my power got shut off, i have no hot water, i just walked in the door soaking wet and cold and stubbed my toe on top of it all. i have no one to be with, i'm lonely and depressed. why did i ever come to chicago. AND SHUT UP YOU DAMN LEAKY FAUCET!" ( all of this did actually happen)

#2. "oh my gosh, i am soooo glad i have nowhere to be today! i can rent movies, make a pie, and cozy up! what's more is i have no homework to do because spring break is just around the corner, and mama will be here in two day's to pick me up for vacation! wow, that leaky faucet really does add charm."

when you put it that way, it really does help. i ended choosing the latter one, and i feel much better now. true to my imaginary conversation i did in fact bake a pie. the only pie that can make me feel better...... apple. after i came to grips with the fact that the weather was just going to suck no matter how many times i cursed the sky i had quite a cozy day with myself. don't pity me! you only wish you had such an amazing rainy/snowy/ice pellety day!

In all seriousness though, if i could manage to make sense of ever terrible situation i find myself in like i did today, i would be much better off. i'm learning... this is progress!

go make a pie, i dare it to taste better than mine. mine's optimistic.

Emulsify Me

Last night in class i took on the challenge of emulsified sauces. this included mayonnaise, burre blanc, and the big, bad Holindaise. the Holindaise sauce is known as one of the toughest challenges in the culinary world. if it breaks while your whisking the butting into the hot egg yolks... your screwed. you can however "save" it with several techniques. Adding a little bit of water to the bowl and whisking it in slowly, or adding a little more clarified butter. the key is in the cooking. if you overcook the egg yolks they get too thick and your sauce won't get frothy and lemon colored like it's supposed too. if you cook them too little the butter and the egg separate causing the eggs to "scramble." as you can see, it's a tedious process. I documented with pictures so you could see how much my sauce DIDN'T work when i sucked at listening to directions... wonderful. Cook along with me please! this will be good for you to try, stretch yourself.

So you start out with three egg yolks, little salt and pepper, and about one tablespoon of water, that was the part that i didn't hear him say so my sauce was ruined. actually i did everything else right, and if i had put the water in i would have had a perfect sauce. but alas, it was not lemon yellow.

You then begin to beat the yolks CONTINUOUSLY over boiling water until they are thick and steaming. yes, your arm will begin to cramp up, push through, you have too.

At this point they begin to get frothy and light lemon yellow, this is GOOD! keeeeeep whipping. right about now your arm should need to be amputated.

lift up your whisk, if the sauce is in what we call the "ribbon stage" your good. it should stream off your whisk in a ribbon into the bowel, and remember, i forgot to add the water so yours should be allot lighter in color than mine is in these pictures. Now your holindaise is complete, taste for seasoning, and add some fresh tarragon if you want. you can serve it on eggs Benedict as it's traditionally known, or one a good steak as well! ok.... go soak your arm in ice...

My mayonnaise, unlike my holindaise kicked butt. it was light, fluffy, perfectly seasoned. Chef complimented it! on the whole... extremely exhausting night. but what i now know is that i CAN emulsify... i should have some sort of badge for that, cause it is no picnic! Good luck on your holindaise... hold you head high.... emulsify.

Time flies when your having fun.... most of the time.

my first quarter in culinary school is drawing to a close, already!! my finals are next monday, and then it's home to Kentucky for two blissful weeks... yes, that's right, i'm coming home!! I'm so excited you cannot imagine. i'm going to do "homey things" some of these would include, grocery shopping with mama, cooking for the fam, date night with naomi, sleepovers, sleepin's, and i love lucy re-runs.

I love this city, I have had a great/terrible first quarter. as far as class goes, i couldn't be happier. i love every minute of being in the kitchen, and i have LOVED nutrition. who would've thought! I have a job now that i will start when i'm back from my trip home. Nanny/Personal chef!!! THAT i am thrilled about. i have a kinda sorta great apartment... :D i'm going to move in august to a much larger one that's closer to school... i don't have many friends, but that's ok, i just moved, give it some time. yes, things have gone pretty well for me, praise God. there are some thing about this city however that i defiantly need a break from. for instance, if one more bum asks me for my spare change i will slap him and take the few quarters that he does have! and if i get a dirty look from someone on the subway one more time because there's NO room on the cramped little hell hole, and i accidentally step on their toes, I will literally.... do something.... and it will be bad... ok. It will be so good to be away from the noise, i noticed the other day that there really isn't a minute of the day that i'm not hearing a loud noise, even at night lying in bed i can hear people talking outside, or a siren, or some woman's heels on the pavement. it starts to get to you even when you don't realize your hearing it!
enough of my complaining. God has totally blessed me with this year, and this life, and i'm sooo grateful for it!

HIGH FIVE GOD.

AND LET SPRING BREAK BEGIN!!!

Comfort Food

Tonight in class we made a bearnese sauce. it's made with cream, white wine, shallots, and butter... mmmm. then we marinated chicken in it with mushrooms and made a leek slaw to go on top. it was definitely comfort food. speaking of comfort food, I've been meaning to ask this for quite some time... what's your comfort food?? I'll go first, i have several ok, you didn't expect me to just have one!
1. Graham crackers with peanut butter
2. bread and olive oil with a dash of balsamic vinegar
3. Grillllled cheese. thus, the name of this blog. there is nothing like a gooey, crispy grilled cheese sandwich on a depressingly cold night. especially when mama makes it in the cast iron skillet, and especially late at night. i remember one time i got home from work at like midnight. i had had the worst day ever ( mama would say, "really? the worst??" and i would tell her to shut the hell up) and i cried the whole way home. i had called mama to see if she was up because i knew the only thing that would make me feel better would be her voice. when i got home she had candles lit, soft music playing, she was wearing her "hobo sweatshirt" and low and behold she was making me a grilled cheese sandwich with tortilla chips. there is NOTHING better than that... nothing.
so what makes you feel like all is right with the world... it doesn't have to be food, it can be a song, a memory, a person.... just let the world know you're comfort object... i won't tell a soul.